I am STILL breathing.

I leave the gas on
Walk the allies in the dark
Sleep with candles burning
I leave the door unlocked
I'm weaving a rope and
Running all the red lights
Did I get your attention
Cause I'm sending all the signs and
The clock is ticking
and I'll be giving my 2 weeks

Pick your favorite shade of black
You'd best prepare a speech
Say something funny
Say something sweet
But don't say that you loved me

Chorus:
Cause I'm still breathing
Though we've been dead for awhile
This sickness has no cure
We're goin down for sure
Already lost a grip
Best abandon ship

Maybe I was too pale
Maybe I was too fat
Maybe you wanted better, better luck off in the sack
No formal education
and I swore way too much
But I swear you didn't f**king care
Cause we were in love

So as I write this letter and shed my last tear
No, it's all for the better
That we end this this year
Let's close this chapter
Say one last prayer
But don't say that you loved me

Chorus

I'm still breathing
I'm still breathing

最近

trying so hard to write in Chinese..but my pinyin was damn sucks..
it will take years for me to finish it..
so i will just use English..is broken English.pls take it..
lolz..this day..someone just tell me that i have change alot..
well..is not the 1st time he tell me so..
but the way he tell this time..
was actually make me shock and bit hurt me...
the word..
i dont thing it should just come out that easy to discribe a girl..
no matter how it be..
i dont deserve that word..
because i did nothing..
hurm...wadever it is..hurt..
i still have to smile and pretend like i am happy..

there are something happen on me this few day that hurt me much..
since i was break up with my super duper ex..
dont ask why i use super duper..coz i dont know too..
it just pass through my mind..
this is the first time i cry like hell..
i have no idea why this time was this hurt...
from the 1st time i talk with u..
there are some feeling inside..
i doesn't make any comment of course..
coz i dont know what feeling is that..
then..crush...the song..i need a girl...
tell me i am too sensitive and actually that is not what u mean..
rite..????tell me i am wrong..

then everything seem like that..
nothing special happen..we never act like couple..
maybe that is u..but what i wanna said is..
until the day u said we better be fren..
i just gonna ask..did any change b4..???????
u said stop wrote word in fb anymore..
is fine.,i respect you...
but seriously..i never noe u look on that...
maybe i irritate u alot...

pls..i was totally lost...
what happen......
i cant manage anything now..final coming...
i lost my mind to study...
i trying to running away from all the place that u might be there...
tears was flowing out like hell every time i saw piic and so on..
and also 090909..the day u said...forever...
i am so sure u are not go going to look at this..
coz actually x one view..
i really think bout you..
remember i was look at the ring on ur finger...
i realize it long time ago..
start observe izzit that is a habit o that really mean something..
which is really special..still..
i dont dare to ask anything...
i refuse to heard any answer like..
this is from my gf..
gosh...pls...i rather noe ntg bout that..

cookies...hurmmm....
is the 1st time..and last time...
i will never make anything again...
anyway..i hope u enjoy ur life..
hope will owes fine..healthy yet happy..

i will try to smile...
try so hard...
it hurt like what i did...
on the leg...
red..hurt..but that make me less some hurt..
coz some hurt been taking by the leg...


i am too shock until i lost my way too cry...
its short...but will owes in my mind..

就是这种感觉

忽然看到的歌词。。感觉很对。。

鸳鸳

我不要你的憐憫 來挽救這脫軌的神經
你的笑 帶著同情 却搖著頭嘆息
幻滅的夢境裡 我盡力摸索愛情的真理
我解開了 猪籠繩裡的禁忌
去爭取 這相愛的權利

兩個人的愛默默在哭泣 來告訴你們相愛的勇氣
蝴蝶飛出了神秘叢林 面對大雨的突襲
一起走過盛開花季。
兩個人的愛默默在哭泣 來告訴你們相愛的勇氣
最後決定放棄 只能無奈面對這感情
我依然很愛你

這份愛 沒有邏輯 變成了你離去的原因
沒有人 願意接受相信 剩下我在努力
不想背叛自己 卻一直不斷被他們唾棄
我會繼續 直到我的抵抗力
足夠面對可畏的話語

兩個人的愛默默在哭泣 來告訴你們相愛的勇氣
蝴蝶飛出了神秘叢林 面對大雨的突襲
一起走過盛開花季。
兩個人的愛默默在哭泣 來告訴你們相愛的勇氣
最後決定放棄 只能無奈面對這感情
我依然很愛你

鴛鴛被人離棄 在高牆另一頭痛苦的悲鳴
只要你相信 我一定堅持到底

我还是那个我吗？

Quite a long time never blogging..
my friend told me that..
blogging is for those emo person..lolz.izzit??
i have no idea...because i use to be a emo girl
[this is what people said about me this day]..
for my side..
why should i pretend to be happy when i am not..
but yes..other people never paid a sen to take care on my emoness..
they will leave you alone at a corner..
and going with their fun..
lots of matters happen this few week..
uncle operation..gandma food poison..me myself was getting fever..[once again]
really a big sigh! for all the sickness and bad thing come all over in once..
that make me feel lost and breathless over and over..
somehow..they said this is life..


am i still the JOAnnE as usual..
i think i am still the same..
even thought i have change alot..
in sense of behavior and mind set.
of course..the only thing i still keep it up..
my size..lmoa!!!!
lol..my symbol ehh~
i agree with my friends word..
observe ...you can see everyone keep on shifting gang from sem to sem..
and so...you will also see how they shift..by what they will shift..
i mean..words!
everything start by WORDS..
to be honest..i am totally fully support what we have discuss when yamcha today..
friendship is all about how u use them..and they using u as well..
is start by using each other..and end by Gossip each other at the back..
rite..???are u really will just ignore what people said about you..??
nahhh....dont be stupid..no one can be sooooooo cool when you become an issue or topic..
kindly tell me if u were..!
and also..
everything will be clear when work together..
the pattern..everyone have their own pattern..
they have their own style to do thing..
don't try to judge people ..
don't put your word in people mouth..
and also.
dont think what YOU think people SUPPOSE to do when they don't.
and SUPPOSE to know what you thinking
tell you what..you are not the world..
you are not the only individual ..you live in a group..
until the end of your life..YOU need to learn HOW to respect people 1st when you need people to respect you...
am i right?
this is the world..
face the fact...DONT TELL ME YOU ARE THE WORLD!!!
last....





I AM SO SICK WITH YOU WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR IDEA ALREADY
PLS DONT SAID YOU ASK FOR OPINION.

i give u a f**king s**t okay!

sickness over and over!

so sad..i am sick again...
i am really lazy to write in Chinese this day..
consider Chinese as a complicated thing now..
there are alot of issue that u cant bring out..
yet..u still need to face it...and the fact is..people dont event care at all!!!!!!!!!!
what a wow!!!!
orite...topic is i am sick..
i am sick for the whole week..
today was getting better...
but i dont think i still have the real voice of mine..
is totally different now...
i manage to make it better by drinking more water..
but it doesn't seem like work.somemore getting worst now..
as i heard what the doctor told me..
is all about the sinus problem.
it might not cure..
it just can be control...
so what all those operation is just a waste..
ok...save up all those time and money..
of course..
the doctor is clever too..i paid for all this information...
RM68 for consultation and also medicine..
what all those medicine is just those asthma ,cough and so on so on...
actually i think those medicine quite cheap...
but the consultation charge alot..
hahah..anyway..thank you anson,sean and soh alot...
they are the one who bring me to the clinic and my dinner on that day too..
accident somemore...excited and funny..
this is my friend..
hahah...i am happy..
ohhhh...i just realise i skip alot of class this day..
hhahah...ehhhh..
i have my mc okay...
the medicine is really make u sleepy..
i am sleepy now...
going to take a rest..AGM later..
sign!!!

回来了！

好久没写了。。哈哈
每次都说着一样的话。。
也对啦。。我有时真的有点懒惰要来更新。。
最近生活还好吧。。
就是混混着过。。
开始很不喜欢去上课。。。
尤其一些感觉大我不多的讲师。。
说话的怪怪的。。不明白。。
身体就是很有问题。。
不懂呃。。
每天好像晕晕的。。脑缺氧。。
哈哈。。看出来吗。。我要傻了。
最近对一些人特别失望。。
以为会一起的。。
结果的结果。。
我不想了。。
还是一个人的快乐。。
以前的那个人。。
她是特产品。。
给的回忆实在是没话说。。
管它的。。
我看不起就对了。。
那女孩。。有一天会理解的。。
人总是要长大的。。
就磨练一下。。她过后会明白的。。
我才不在乎你现在对我有什么看法。。
因为你对我的生命也没影响。。
最近忙学会的事
发现。。很多人的办事效率有问题。。
不是说我的好。。而是囔着说改革的人。。
却又有点却步。。
该怎么说我也不懂。。心知道。。




this part is purposely for you..tiri..
i know that u wont understand any single word if i wrote in chinese..
haha~~
i am happy to be ur friends..
we will happy with what we choose to be..
and ..
pls always remember..
i care about you too..
you really a good one..
like what i did before...'will never change..
*heart you*

the last word from me to you...my bao bei

bao bei...this will be the last blog from me to you...
i was so hurt and sad when i get to know...
lastly..you were really fall in love with the girl...
but from the way you talk...the way you tell me...
i can feel that you are really happy with the girl..
no matter what happen...
i hope you happy from now..to forever...
my heart will always there for you..
i will leave your life from now until the day you need me ..
my phone will always there for you...

don't ask about my life then..
because i will just said...
i would really take a long time to back to the normal life like before...
i think the time i need is forever....
love was just freak me out...
i cant take the risk to be hurt by someone or whatever anymore...

i hope you understand...
i did really care what you feel and what you trying to be...
you will always stay in my heart...
no matter what you are..
i really love you so much..

no matter you will look in this or not...
i would like to say....
i was spend the time for you...
and it will be the memory...in my mind forever...
bao bei...li kai ni...wo zhen de hao bu yuan yi...
ke shi que you si na me nan jie sou..ni ai shang ta le..
zai jian le...wo de babo bei owi lin yik ching..love